I cleared it and that too with all stars in 70+ range...Hurraay!!!

And down beneath, with foxen eyes...

The many scatter in the wood,

Dividing left'and right:

These follow Zaboi, those attend

Fierce Slavoi to the fight;

And towards the mountain blue they go

Deep through the forest's night.

And when the fifth day's sun arose

True hands they gave and took,

And down beneath, with foxen eyes,

On the king's host they look.

I m late

I m late...to think about IAS
...to think about being a rebel
...to think how I cud I have saved myself
...to think, if I am still worth
...to think, if ppl still trust me
...to think, if I am still strong
...to think, if I have my principles intact
...to think,what shall I do...

just flow as it comes...

I am sad and low...powerless n speechless... small and impotent...unclear n unfortunate...guilty n foolish...

I am late to prove my worth...

IN COVERSATION - GOD AND ME

At variant locations and time points -

Me: God, this is going to be great.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, look I have prayed a lot this time. It should be different, ok.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I am not demanding full of x but half of x will do.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I will be so happy to see them happy.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Last time, God.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Once more, God.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I am just there.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Just Once more, God.
God: (Smiles)


REALITY IS - HE ONLY LISTENS AND SMILES WHATEVER THE CASE BE.
DRAW TWO LESSONS -

1. Keep on proposing to God. He may/may not help. But it reassures self-belief.
2.To become GOD - Just LISTEN, SMILE and do WHATEVER You feel is correct. You will become God.

SECOND ONE IS MORE IMPORTANT.

After drawing the lesson -

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Smiles Smiles Smiles ...
AND GOD AND I FALL IN LOVE.

Straight to the point - Nidhi Goyal

Straight to the point. I enlarged the photo in my fax viewer and saw this:

You can see for yourself the picture is beautiful.

Everything is awesome.Perfection and the imperfection; both. Part that protrudes from the the lower jaw is superb. It blends well with the smile. I wont call it chin caz calling that would have omitted a few muscles between the lower lip and chin line. Blending as I say of the smile with the lower jaw is superb. Smile no one would have questions about it. Tho I have doubts if it is as broad as it seems from the side view. The right cheek displays enouf to arouse the curiosity by giving a sense of unaccomplishment in studying the face. Matching of the nose line or rather scoring of the nose line just over the right cheek also adds to the mystery of not knowing the right part. Fully visible upper teeth being just above the lower lip leave room for no improvement in the lower face region. Small is beautiful. With eyes this is not generally true. But the fox-en frozen feeling of the black balls -- hidden under the eye-lashes -- with a nice eye theard work looks awesome. Again nicely parloured hair are misplaced enuf to arouse one to offer a hand and say 'Shall I help you with them?'. They come right to the shoulders with a perfect length; just enough to let the V-line visible. Long earings visible fully senses richness. Hidden ears add to the unknown. Neck-lines are generally appreciated. She has that and you can notice it. What is special about neck is the flow with which it leaves the chin n meets the neck-line. Awesome. Though I would have loved to have seen the flow continued till the V-line; which does break the symmetry at bottom center of the picture. If the back would have been more straight she might have overcome that as well. Or a little more camera angle towards the right would have covered that.

Adding to the beauty of skin and hair and teeth bones there's deeper sense of confidence which not only is prominent on face but is pouring out of the eyes more predominantly. Eyes - as I cud decipher have two emotions - Victory and some fox-en attribute which it seems I have no words for. It seems she knows it that 'She is beautiful'. I dont know how intelligent/smart she is but given she is; she deserves to rule the kings.

YOU ARE AWESOME GURL. I MIGHT HAVE WRITTEN A FEW MORE WORDS BUT HAVE A FEW INTERVIEWS LINED UP. KEEP ROBBING HEARTS.

My Concept of Awesome - Anyways, sometimes a few things make you stop and you look in awe. And most of the times we get look at them for a min or two and then start thinking about them. Try knowing more about them and appreciating them. But if neither appreciation comes out nor we try to know more about for first few minutes than I call it AWESOME.

LINES I LOVE THE MOST

There was in a courtyard,
an old cement wall.
Thunder lightning, nothing could
touch it at all.

It was cold and sturdy and topped
with bits of glass
It defied age, time or reason, it let
nobody pass.


One day through a tiny crack
there emerged
A tiny green stem with a leaf
still unfurled.

It has no soil to hold on to,
no water at all.
It had nothing in with the
old grey wall.

But slowly the tiny green stem
grew roots.
And the stem branched out
into multiple shoots.

Soon a crack appeared in the
unshakable wall.
Those who preserve, conquer
it all.



Honoring greatness.

To achieve something gives a great feeling. And sometimes to let it go gives greater

Question: As I sit here in office,I think: Why did I do bad in CFA xam?

Response : There are many explanations [and reactions] that may soothe my frens n family:
"Course was too tough",Ma.
"At least you tried",Papa.
"He he",Supriyo
"Keep your fingers crossed",Didi.
"Mere saath diyo ab june mein",Karthik.
"saale tu bahut bada negative thinker hai, tera ho jayega"Nikhil Bhai

"Rehne do****Kyuin",Khushboo

"hmmmmmm",Vidhushi.
"Office was too hectic,man"Deep

Past : I would not say this was my first xam where I did bad. Scored 22/50 in english gram in 2nd. Scored 53/100 in maths in 10th. 64/100, English - 10th. 37/100, Sanskrit-8th, was amongst last 3-4 guys in nursery and KinderGarden. But I never took as them defeats. I always laughed at the teachers and took them as opportunities to score more. A few times, I did and many a times I didn't. I am no Hero. But good thing was: I didn't loose battles without fighting. I was always happy fighting.

Present: But this time it was different. I lost it. I didn't laugh at it. And I have not taken this as a challenge, this time. It's different. Its not a Zen's calm. It is a tired person's acceptance of defeat.

Race: Now does that make me one among those who are at the bottom of the race [Races don't go left to right or right to left these days; they go top to bottom and bottom to top. Gives you the liberty to pull the legs of ones above you or watch thru their legs. Great if your boss is a She. Also, keep pissing on ones below you. Learned this at the org i m working for:) CopyRight - KapilGoyal] No that does nt make me one below the ones above me. I feel myself trapped in a marathon, where everyone wants to come first. I am standing right in the center of this running rushing crowd pushing me along willingly/unwillingly.

Me: I am tired of running. I stand demotivated. Out of the purple haze, I am trapped in the $$$HAZE$$$ - worst thing that could happen to me. I find a way out: find solace listening to Sri-2 RaviShanker. But then I forgot his lessons the moment I lost his sight. Anyways, life has not been all that cruel to me. I will fight back and win. Caz that is me. But then, why have I to fail once before making it heads. God is great and he always will be. I search for a race I would love to be a part of. I-Banking is day(s) in-thing. Today/tomorrow I will turn this around but will I do what I enjoy most doing in life:Talking. Or I will I keep venting out my anguish [over this over-awed society of mine] only on blogs. I have promised myself that I will do four things for sure in life: ***Serve my parents [Nothing new] ***Make a film ***Open a charity school in my grandpa's village ***____*** I am keeping fourth blank for anything new that comes to life.

Gyan: You have to come to terms with life. You have to keep the bar low. Probably, I feel more clear about my life now. Right. A balanced life like a balanced diet is the solution. Every thing has to be done. It is not an acceptance of defeat but a pleasure of realising: Life is important.

Prediction: On the timescale, my story will be like this : **Health[mental and physical]**Amrika.**Study.**Ibanking**Money**Marriage**Serve.**2-3 maal gf's [my daughters]**Direct[a film]/Write a book**Open Charity School**Smile&Pass-Away**.

Question: Life is simple. Isn't it?