SO this was the GAP :)

And when I left my CFA dream...

This is like saying I don't want Nicole Kidman because I don't have time.

Going on a business trip the same day as that of CFA level 2 makes me feel hapless. But the reality is I was quite far in terms of even solving 2 out of 20 Qs there. My manager says - ask if they can return your money. Hah! poor he; doesn't know - give a rupee to a beggar today and ask for it again tommorow - he won't return.Leave alone a profit org. Reparation is no more a truth on this planet.

So next this thing is - Keep going dude...

My first few days here!

ISKON TEMPLE

Good old stories of RK Narayan. Very simiar was Bangalore as first arrrived here and was given a service appartnent in middle of the typical south indian culto...same old men half-clad with full lenght lungis; half-english half-Kannada security guards; half-baked chappatis; half-hearted service to northies. Very typical to south india I read in RK Narayan n was being told by hard core northies.

11 days have gone. Situation changed. Bangalore is not that bad. I moved out of the service appartment to a posh residential area. Now I understand why people like 'bangy' so much. I dindnt find northy food other than 'Chandini chownk' anyware. But also what I didnt find was 'rice drenched unclean hands'. Good food; clean food. Not only Kannda babes but a huge no. of bengalans n punjabans n mumbaikars....n expats too if u r lucky enuf. Bangalore has a good face too but you have to be in right places.

I am waiting to be exposed to best part of bangalore. - the nite life. How bangalore rocks when Delhi sleeps. Hope to see that soon :)

I cleared it and that too with all stars in 70+ range...Hurraay!!!

And down beneath, with foxen eyes...

The many scatter in the wood,

Dividing left'and right:

These follow Zaboi, those attend

Fierce Slavoi to the fight;

And towards the mountain blue they go

Deep through the forest's night.

And when the fifth day's sun arose

True hands they gave and took,

And down beneath, with foxen eyes,

On the king's host they look.

I m late

I m late...to think about IAS
...to think about being a rebel
...to think how I cud I have saved myself
...to think, if I am still worth
...to think, if ppl still trust me
...to think, if I am still strong
...to think, if I have my principles intact
...to think,what shall I do...

just flow as it comes...

I am sad and low...powerless n speechless... small and impotent...unclear n unfortunate...guilty n foolish...

I am late to prove my worth...

IN COVERSATION - GOD AND ME

At variant locations and time points -

Me: God, this is going to be great.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, look I have prayed a lot this time. It should be different, ok.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I am not demanding full of x but half of x will do.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I will be so happy to see them happy.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Last time, God.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Once more, God.
God: (Smiles)

Me: God, I am just there.
God: (Smiles)

Me: Just Once more, God.
God: (Smiles)


REALITY IS - HE ONLY LISTENS AND SMILES WHATEVER THE CASE BE.
DRAW TWO LESSONS -

1. Keep on proposing to God. He may/may not help. But it reassures self-belief.
2.To become GOD - Just LISTEN, SMILE and do WHATEVER You feel is correct. You will become God.

SECOND ONE IS MORE IMPORTANT.

After drawing the lesson -

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Me: (Smiles)
God: (Smiles)

Smiles Smiles Smiles ...
AND GOD AND I FALL IN LOVE.